Monday

Do You Share Recipes? Weigh In.

We had a nice weekend. I hope you did too. We had family in town last week. And more family over for Father's Day dinner. The food tasted great and the cupcakes, remember the cupcakes. They were a huge hit. It is a good feeling when things turn out.
While my husband's family was in town we went to his cousins for a family BBQ. I was asked to bring a salad. I brought a family favorite. The hostess asked for the recipe.

Before I could respond to the request, one of the women said, "Or are you one of those people who don't share their recipes? Hahaha!"

Yeow!

I was going to share until you put it that way. I thought.

I avoided the request the rest of the night but have been thinking about it ever since.

Where do I stand on this subject?

On one hand, I am always SOOOO grateful when someone is willing to share a recipe with me. Almost all of our favorite recipes have come from someone else. Either a relative, friend, a cookbook or a website. I specifically remember a time when I had to entertain for Easter. A big holiday in our home. With two days notice and my mom not around to help, I had to feed 24 people. I called my dear friend Megan and asked for two recipes that she had served at a party a few weeks earlier. She didn't even bat an eye. I am still grateful for her willingness to share that day.

On the other hand, I feel like I am a very good "sharer". When someone asks I am happy to oblige. But sometimes I don't want to share recipes. Some recipes are special. The special ones are from my grandmother who has now passed away. I use them a lot, take them to special things, and when people ask if they can have the recipes, I share but it is a little harder. I am protective of these sentimental recipes.

When a close friend like Megan share their "signature" recipes with me, I don't always feel like they are mine to pass on either.

Since the BBQ there has been some angst. Is there a right and wrong?

WHAT DO YOU DO?
DO YOU SHARE YOUR RECIPES?

DO YOU THINK THERE IS EVER A TIME WHEN IT IS APPROPRIATE TO TELL SOMEONE YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE SHARING?

Family Volley

21 comments:

  1. Almost every recipe can be found online now anyway. And what's the point of making enjoyable food for people when they can't make it for themselves later? And if the recipe is so great, why not share? You can say, "Oh yeah, isn't it great?" (Take it as a compliment.) "I got it from my friend Soandso." Or, "My grandma made up this recipe and it's been in the family forever! I just ask that you still call it Grandma Soandso's Whatever." That way, the honor still goes to your grandmother.

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  2. My mom always had a box full of recipe cards that she had gotten from other people. They each had the name of the recipe and who she had received it from. I was always grateful to all those women who shared their fantastic recipes with my mom. I strongly believe that fantastic recipes should be freely shared so as many people can make them as possible (unless you're running a restaurant and trying to sell the food in which case I can understand not sharing).

    It frustrates me when people say thhey have secret recipes that are only for their family or that they will take with them to their grave. It seems fairly selfish to me to deprive everyone else of the opportunity to make and enjoy a particularly delicious recipe. Especially if they have specifically requested it. I know I only request recipes when I really, really enjoyed the dish. When I get a recipe from someone else, I think of them everytime I make it, and it makes me happy to both make and eat.

    Goo food is such an easy art form to share. Eating something delicious is, for me, similar to seeing a beautiful painting or hearing an amazing song. I want to make it a part of my home, to share that beauty and enjoyment with my family. I can do that with posters and prints for some art, I can purchase a CD for music, and I buy cookbooks for great recipes, but if the recipe is not from a cookbook, then I'm stuck unless the person who made it is willing to share.

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  3. I always wished my grandma would share her meatball recipe, they were the best, but she never did and now the recipe is lost forever! What's the point in that?!?!?

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  4. I too, am all for sharing. Sharing whether it be knowledge, advice, recipes, or material items only makes us a stronger better community of women. The chance to help out a sister should be relished!

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  5. I am glad when people are willing to share. I am also glad that when they aren't, the internet shows how silly they are.

    There are some recipes though that cannot be written down. Louisiana chicken and dumplins is a very hard recipe to share. I still don't have a hard copy, and had to do a visual learning to get it. When people ask for it, I just have to tell them that I would have to show them.

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  6. I think you should always share anything that makes life better and happier, and lets be honest food does both of those! I am always morethan willing to share and I feel silly if I ask someone and they turn me down.

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  7. I find that when I am hesitant to share anything like recipes or craft ideas, it usually has a lot more to do with how I feel about the person asking than how I feel about the origin of the recipe or idea. That is something to repent of for sure.

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  8. I usually share recipes. If people enjoy the recipe that much I would like them to make it for themselves. But, when I share them I credit where it came from or keep a name in the title, etc. so they know it's not my original recipe.

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  9. I am all about the sharing. I have always thought those "secret recipes" are a bit silly!! At least I never understood the idea behind not sharing a recipe. i do however give credit where credit is due. My recipes all have names next to them so I know where they came from!

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  10. I agree, good food should be shared!
    Besides, some people just can't follow a recipe and theirs may never be as good as yours!
    My mom can't make my cookie recipes and have them turn out, but then she thinks she needs to add extra flour! lol So, I say share and then see who can really cook!

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  11. Thank you so much for your comments today. Love all the straight forward honesty. I agree, sharing is the way to go. After all, that is what blogging is all about, right? Sharing what we love, know, have discovered, need help with. A community. If we can help make others lives easier, then that is what we should do. No matter how we feel about the person.:)

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  12. I am all for sharing MOST things. We do have a couple of recipes we won't, or can't share. We make our own pasta sauce which is something that most people aren't going to do so we don't get too many people asking for it, but it's a "keep it in the family" recipe. That's mostly because it's based on a recipe from a friend who wasn't supposed to share with us (by order of his grandmother.) We try to respect his family's secret recipe by not sharing it along.

    That said, we have a couple of things we do not share, but for the most part, we share our recipes. (Or just tell people "this is the third recipe you've requested from this book, you may want to invest in the whole book. It's really good.")

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  13. I think sharing is fine for the most part, but like 'boyrus' said, there are a few recipes that I will not share.

    It isn't because of the person asking, it is because I have been asked to keep it in the family and so I will pass it down to my children (and they to theirs), but beyond that, I won't.

    I think that sometimes it is nice to have things that you can 'bring to the table' at picnics/dinners, that no one else can.

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  14. depends on how I got the recipe. If someone gave it to me, then by all means, I'll share it. If I got it out of a cookbook, I tell the requestor where to find it. I've had some people not happy we me about that, but whatev...I had to buy it, you can too. Besides, wouldn't sharing a copyrighted recipe defeat the author's purpose of selling her own cookbook?

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  15. Boysrus, Luke and Katie, Amanda,
    Thanks you for weighing in. It is nice to know I am not the only one that feels a "few" recipes can be kept within the family. The recipes from my grandma are passed on through the generations and have been for years now. We also have a few from friends that we aren't supposed to have either. They were given to us with the promise to not pass them on. I don't feel right giving those out.

    Amanda, Hadn't thought about the copyright issues, but you make an interesting point.

    Overall, I really try to be a helpful and "sharing" person, but there are a few that I just can't give away.

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  16. Amanda- Does that mean you don't share any of your movies or music as well since it would prevent the creators from making money? How about clothes?

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Hi Hi! It always makes my day to hear what you have to say. Let's keep this conversation going. Thank you for your comments. Don't want to leave a comment here, email me at blog.familyvolley@gmail.com.

 
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