Non-Medicated OR Medicated, DOES NOT A MOTHER MAKE!
This past week I was privy to a conversation between two women. One of the women told the other that to be a "real mother" you have to have your babies without pain medication, at home.
I had to turn away and bite my tongue, to not say something rude and off putting.
This is not the first time I have heard a statement like this.
Over the past 10 years I have had more than one woman tell me, that I am less of a mother because of my personal choices when it comes to giving birth.
Wow, the implications of statements like this are monumentally destructive.
There is not room for this type of judgement if we want to be successful mothers and women. We need to support one another, uplift one another, and stop judging one another.
Shouldn't we feel much gratitude for all of the options that we as women have when it comes to our families? There are options today that our mothers and grandmothers never dreamed of. So many options that even after having 4 children, I am naive to the possibilities of them all.
We get to choose, each of us get to choose what we feel is best for our families. What a blessing! We should be rejoicing, not judging.
Just because a women "suffers" more pain during delivery than another women, does not make her better. Just because a women feels "no pain" during delivery does not make her better. Neither should be used to define the type of mother a woman is.
Is it really pain medication or location of delivery that determines if we are mothers?
Or, does the title of mother have more to do with our choices after our children are in our lives? Isn't that what makes a mother?
The never ending, never wavering love. The complete and endless sacrifice of all things. The giving of our time and energy and talents for their well being. The willingness to put aside any cares and concerns we have for ourselves, for our children.
Yep, let's be grateful that we can all choose, and stop judging other's choices. This will leave more time for us to raise our children and support the women around us.
Have you ever been judged because of your birthing choices?
Do you have an opinion on the subject?
Edit added February 1, 2012: There was a sincere effort with this post, a simply hope, for less judgment and more acceptance. It was not meant to support any specific birthing choice, or imply that one is better than the other. It was not written for validation. Hence the reason I left my own birthing choices out. I personally have given birth both ways, and have been criticized for both choices. The hope was that we could all be grateful for the fact that we can choose. What ever choice that might be. I know I am very grateful that I have been able to choose.