About two years ago our family found a new pastime. We were introduced to indexing. It was our son who learned first and then brought the new found passion home and taught my husband and me.
Indexing lets you type names from old records into a database that people worldwide can use to find their ancestors. It is so fun! It is like a little puzzle. We look at birth certificate and census records and type the names and information we find. The process is so simple that my husband and I and our two oldest children can do it together from the comfort of our home, whenever time allows. It has been a great activity to bring us closer together. If you wonder if you should participate in indexing, here are 8 great reasons.
As you can imagine, when we heard about the upcoming "Worldwide Indexing Event" we got pretty excited.
From July 15-17, FamilySearch International will sponsor the third annual “Worldwide Indexing Event." The event will bring 72,000 people from around the globe together online during a 72-hour event to save the world’s records by making them searchable to the public.
During the 72-hour indexing period, volunteers participate by downloading the FamilySearch software and completing as many names as they would like. Anyone with a computer and internet connection can join.
Volunteers have made over one billion historic records searchable online since FamilySearch introduced online indexing in 2008. The demand for indexed records continues to grow as millions of historical records worldwide are added every year.
To join 72,000 teammates in saving the World’s records, visit https://familysearch.org/worldsrecords.
FamilySearch International is the largest genealogy organization in the world. It is a nonprofit, volunteer-driven organization sponsored by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. FamilySearch and its predecessors have been actively gathering, preserving, and sharing genealogical records worldwide for over 100 years. Patrons may access FamilySearch services and resources free online at FamilySearch.org or through over 4,921 family history centers in 129 countries.
Our family will be participating this year and would love to have you join us. Click here for all the info you need and to get signed up.
Tuesday
How To Be A Low Maintenance Mom
After running across a blog post on Mom Explores Michigan, KSL Studio 5 asked me to tackle a segment on how to be a "Low Maintenance Mom." Give it a watch. By the time you are done you will know that your kids need a "good enough" mom more than a perfect one.
Monday
Utah Event: "Once I Was A Beehive!" Movie Release and PARTY!!!
Well look no further. Do you live in Utah? Are you looking for a great new movie to take your girls to?
We are excited to announce that we (the Co-hosts) of The Living Room, our new online podcast, will be hosting and emceeing two screenings of the new film, "Once I Was A Beehive!" From those who brought us "The Saratov Approach" comes a sweet film based on hundreds of true stories about Girl's Camp, the campers, the leaders and the experiences at camp. Experiences that last a lifetime! I clearly remember each and every year I attended camp, and I wouldn't trade those memories for anything. You can rest assured that this will be a great movie for your daughters, and for you.
The movie isn't released until August 14th, but you can see it early, meet some of the cast and crew, win prizes and of course meet us! It is a PARTY and we hope you will come. If you are interested in attending, please do the following.
1. Check out the Facebook group and RSVP https://www.facebook.com/events/100279866991871/
2. Purchase your ticket! Simply RSVP'ing does not assure you a seat....be sure you follow the links and buy your tickets. THEY WILL SELL OUT, so don't delay.
We will be at the following events. WE WOULD LOVE TO MEET YOU!
TUESDAY, AUGUST 4th, 2015 @ 7pm
Megaplex Pineview 10
St. George, UT
FRIDAY, AUGUST 7th, 2015 @ 7pm
Cinemark University Mall
Orem, UT
We are excited to be co-hosting this awesome movie! We are excited to meet you! Don't miss it!
Sunday
Getting Your Kids To Listen To You!
(A version of this post originally aired as a guest post I wrote for TheIdeaRoom.net)
Do you have a child who doesn't listen and has to be reminded numerous times before they will do what they're asked? Of course, we all do! Every once in a while all of our children will tune us out.
When everything seems to be going in one ear and out the other, here are 6 tips for getting your words to stick.
1. Don't start talking until you have your child's attention.
Get down on their level opposed to hovering above them, expect distractions to be turned off or paused, be sure you are making eye contact, and then talk. It is also okay to ask for their attention. "Please look
2. Get to the point.
As parents we tend to use too many words and explain too much when we are talking to our children. All the extra words give our children time to tune us out. Keep it short, simple and to the point.
3. Don't repeat yourself
The first thing most of us do when our children don't listen, is to repeat ourselves. And then repeat ourselves again, and again. (Followed by telling our children we are tired of sounding like a broken record :)) Don't! Saying things over and over teaches our children they don't have to listen because they know we will say it again and they can listen another time. Stop repeating yourself and just say things one time. If they don't listen the first time, make sure you had their attention to begin with. If you feel you had their attention and they still didn't listen, then let the consequences follow. This will take some practice for us, and for our children. It is hard at first to not repeat ourselves.
4. Be Reasonable.
Put yourself in your child's shoes for a minute. Imagine if we were right in the middle of doing something important to us, or doing something we love. And all of a sudden someone came in and demanded that we immediately get up and do what they say. How would we feel? We wouldn't want to listen, we would be frustrated and irritated! It isn't any different with our children. When a child is involved in something else, be considerate with the requests. Sure there will be times when we need immediate action, but for the most part, we can think ahead and cushion our requests. Think of it as warning them about what it coming up. It gives them time to finish up what they are doing and prepare for what is next.
5. Uphold consequences
When children don't listen, we need to uphold the consequences. If we don't, then it sends our children the message that is is okay to ignore us because we won't follow through anyway. We can set general consequences that apply to not listening. Such as "If you don't listen the first time, you have to go to your room. We can set consequences that are tied to the request itself. "If you want to play outside, please finish your homework." And/or we can let the natural consequences take their course. Such as when a child doesn't get their shoes on and get in the car when asked, then they don't get to go. The key is to be clear with the consequences before hand and to make sure we follow through. Even if they come to you and say they didn't hear you. Don't back down. Just invite them to do better next time.
6. Establish Schedules
Want to save yourself the stress of constantly reminding your kids what to do before they go to bed? Create a schedule or routine and your kids wont have to be told what they need to do because they will already know. Why, because you do the same thing every night. These routines can be established for everything. Getting ready for school, what to do after school, household chores, etc... I know for our daughter, she does better when the schedule is written down. So we write down the order of what needs to be done and she refers to it when needed. Instead of constantly nagging her, I just reminder her to check her schedule.
A few simple changes to the way we talk to, and handle our children, and you should see huge improvements in their listening skills. Just remember that along with the above suggestions, we have to be good examples. When they talk to us we need to put away our distractions and listen with full intent. Children will do what we do, before they do what we say, so set a good example and they will learn from the best!
Do you ever find it hard to listen to your kids?
Do you have a chronic non-listener? How do you get through to them?
Wednesday
Tips for a SUCCESSFUL Summer Break!
School's. Out. For Summer! Woo Hoo! This is a great time of year (although Utah is really really REALLY hot right now), but can also be overwhelming for families as they navigate the next two and a half months. Here are three tips that will help make your summer, the best yet.
First, SET GOALS.
I know what you are thinking, summer should be carefree, goals are for the school year. That is not the case. Now that summer is here, take a few minutes to sit down together and talk about what it is you want to accomplish this summer. Get an understanding of what each of your children hopes to have happen over the summer also. Everyone sees this time differently and without discussion and goals, the new school year will start before we know it, and people will fill dissatisfied and disappointed. For example, our son sees summer break as a time to relax. He wants fewer responsibilities and more down time. Our daughter on the other hand sees it as a time to "do more stuff." Always wanting to go and see and do. I see summer as a time for us to be together and catch up on all those things we can't get to during the school year, like cleaning out closets. Take time and set some goals that help each person feel heard and needs met and then decided on a daily/weekly basis how you are going to meet those goals. Not only will it give your family a direction, but everyone will feel included and satisfied.
Second, KEEP A ROUTINE.
Again, I know what you are thinking, summer is a time for no schedule and no routine, but that is not the case. Although it is a time for more exceptions, keeping a schedule most of the time will keep everyone happy. Keep bed times, meal times, and nap times consistent. This will make everyday life much better as children will not be overtired or ornery and it will cut down on "melt-downs." It will also make for children who are better mannered and more happy when you do head out for those fun summer activities. This doesn't mean that kids can't stay up a bit to enjoy the long summer nights, just don't abandon your routine altogether. Plus, it will make the transition back to school life so much easier. Getting up won't be such a shock to their little systems.
Third, RELAX, BE FLEXIBLE, DON'T OVER SCHEDULE.
Summer break goes by so fast! Before we know it the calendar is overflowing again and we are scrambling to keep up with the day-to-day. Be flexible and let your family feel you relax also. Allow for laughter, fun, spontaneity, and let your own guard down. Say "yes" more and worry less. Put less on the calendar and don't over schedule. The worst is going back to school exhausted because the summer has not allowed for any down time. Use it as a time to bond and rejuvenate and relax. Everyday doesn't have to have a major field trip or play date. It can if you want, of course, but consider a little more down time. More legos on the floor and less time racing around town from one museum to another. A good rule of thumb might be one "big" activity or adventure each week. Then let the other 6 days of the week "just be." It will be amazing to see what your kids come up with.
Summer is a magical time of year and looks different for every family. By setting some goals, sticking to a routine, and not over scheduling our families, it can be even better.
What are your goals for summer break?
This post first appeared on TheIdeaRoom.net where you can find me guest posting twice a month.
HUGE General Conference Giveaway
It's spring time which means General Conference will be here before we know it. Seventeen LDS Bloggers are joining me to share a few of our favorite things. We are so excited to be giving away over $400 in prizes. It's been a treat to work with so many talented women to spoil our readers with products that strengthen the family and make our lives a little easier, too.
We as bloggers are so thankful for you - our readers! Thank you for your encouragement, comments, and time that you take out of your busy day to check in with us. We appreciate how you #sharethegood with us and hopefully we can share some with you as well!
Meet the bloggers who are taking part in this giveaway:
Now for the giveaway! If you are anything like me, your wish list for Deseret Book is a mile long! We are excited to send two of you some fun money to spend there. We hope you love the recipes from the Six Sisters as much as we do and that Nicole Carpenter's 5-minute messages will make family devotional more manageable! From bulking up your food storage with Thrive to the cutest projects by Fizzy Pops - there are so many wonderful prizes. Check them out and ENTER TO WIN below! There are TWO rafflecopters so be sure to enter each one!
Prize Package #1
$85 Gift Card to Deseret Book
$50 Gift Card to Sweet Salt Clothing
Fizzy Pops Young Women Zipper Pull Kit ($50 value) with
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Prize Package #2
$85 Gift Card to Deseret Book
$75 value Food Storage Package from Thrive
$50 Gift Card to Sego Lily Soap
Pink Star CTR Necklace and I am a Child of God Pin from Ringmasters
a Rafflecopter giveaway
The winner will be announced and e-mailed April 2.
We've compiled a few of our favorite General Conference Activities, Recipes, and Ideas. Comment with your favorite traditions or add a link below!
[inlinkz_linkup id=509188 mode=1]
Tuesday
52 Weeks To Fortify Your Family *GIVEAWAY*
This year our family has started the new year with a renewed focus on studying the scriptures together. With children from the age of 12 down to 1, it can be difficult to find a way to strengthen and uplift everyone at the same time. Not to mention, hard to find a time when everyone will sit and listen.
After much thought, we decided that right after dinner was the best time for us. (While everyone is already sitting at the table). And thanks to Nicole Carpenter, we have found a new approach that has made the first month of scripture study a fantastic experience for our family.
52 Weeks is a theme-based approach to daily deotionals for Latter-day Saint families. The book offers an assortment of topics from kindness and citizenship to prayer and repentance.
Each week has a different topic and then each day of the week has a message already prepared for you. Scriptures and quotes are included. BUT....it is not overwhelming. Last week our family talked about Happiness. We love being able to talk about things for 7 days. It allows us to really cover the topic. And it lets our children think about things each day.
Another thing I love about the book is the section at the back that focuses on holiday devotionals. Love and Valentine's Day, Easter and the Atonement, our Nation and Independence Day, Fear and Halloween, Graitude and Thanksgiving and the Nativity and Christmas. The perfect way to keep the spirit in the holidays, year round.
"52 Weeks to Fortify your Family" has completely changed our families scripture study experience. It has taken so much stress out of it for my husband and I. And our children love sitting around the table after dinner and talking. They grab the book each night and bring it to the table with willing hearts and minds. Your family will LOVE this book.
"52 Weeks" is already a #1 bestseller on Amazon. If you want your own copy you can grab one online at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or in Desert Book or Seagull Book.
You can enter to win your own Autographed Copy of "52 Weeks" RIGHT HERE!
The giveaway will end in one week, on Tuesday February 3rd.
a Rafflecopter giveaway
After much thought, we decided that right after dinner was the best time for us. (While everyone is already sitting at the table). And thanks to Nicole Carpenter, we have found a new approach that has made the first month of scripture study a fantastic experience for our family.
52 Weeks is a theme-based approach to daily deotionals for Latter-day Saint families. The book offers an assortment of topics from kindness and citizenship to prayer and repentance.
Each week has a different topic and then each day of the week has a message already prepared for you. Scriptures and quotes are included. BUT....it is not overwhelming. Last week our family talked about Happiness. We love being able to talk about things for 7 days. It allows us to really cover the topic. And it lets our children think about things each day.
Another thing I love about the book is the section at the back that focuses on holiday devotionals. Love and Valentine's Day, Easter and the Atonement, our Nation and Independence Day, Fear and Halloween, Graitude and Thanksgiving and the Nativity and Christmas. The perfect way to keep the spirit in the holidays, year round.
"52 Weeks to Fortify your Family" has completely changed our families scripture study experience. It has taken so much stress out of it for my husband and I. And our children love sitting around the table after dinner and talking. They grab the book each night and bring it to the table with willing hearts and minds. Your family will LOVE this book.
"52 Weeks" is already a #1 bestseller on Amazon. If you want your own copy you can grab one online at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or in Desert Book or Seagull Book.
You can enter to win your own Autographed Copy of "52 Weeks" RIGHT HERE!
The giveaway will end in one week, on Tuesday February 3rd.
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Thursday
Christmas SALE!-Family Fun Friday Book!!!!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
As a thank you for all your support and friendship, Family Fun Friday Game and Activity Book (pdf version) is on SALE for $4.99, from now until Christmas. That's 50% OFF. Featured on KSL Studio 5, The Matt Townsend Show, and numberous blogs and websites, families rave about Family Fun Friday's.
$4.99 for over 90 pages of unique fun for your family. And remember, most games and activities use supplies that are already in your home and are perfect for families with members of all ages. Even your little ones and your teenagers will not only be able to play, but they will WANT TO PLAY!
The sale is for the digital download which is perfect because it means you will have your book and all the amazing games and activities in time for your holiday celebrations with family and friends.
Family Fun Friday's has never been sold for this price, so grab it quick and start playing with your family TODAY.
Click here, or click on the red BUY THE BOOK tab at the top right of the page. Simply choose the pdf download version of the book and enter familyvolleyfun in the Discount Code box in the bottom left corner of the screen and the book is all yours.
You and your family are going to love playing together!
Trick or Treat Scavenger Hunt - Happy Halloween
Tonight is the night! The costumes are ready and the kids have laid them out at the foot of their beds. We will be trick-or-treating with Maleficent, Doc McStuffins, A French Artist, Steve Jobs, and a little 10 month old flower. The kids are excited, and I am still in awe that it is the end of October.
Twice a month I have the chance to post over at TheIdeaRoom.net. If you haven't stopped by, you MUST. Amy has the most amazing, fun, projects, Printables, holiday fun on the net. Plus, she is one of the most amazing women I have met.
This Week I shared a Family Halloween Scavenger Hunt with her readers. I know it is something your family will love to. Simply print it out and take it with you as you go trick or treating tonight. Your whole family will love it!
We are going to use it for our 3 year old, who will trick or treat, but likes to take her time, and will ask to get in the stroller after about an hour. It will be around that time that she is looking for something to do, and this Scavenger Hunt will be the perfect way to keep her occupied will her older siblings keep knocking doors.
I hope you and your family can use it tonight also.
Happy Haunting.
Tell me, who are you trick-or-treating with tonight?
Twice a month I have the chance to post over at TheIdeaRoom.net. If you haven't stopped by, you MUST. Amy has the most amazing, fun, projects, Printables, holiday fun on the net. Plus, she is one of the most amazing women I have met.
This Week I shared a Family Halloween Scavenger Hunt with her readers. I know it is something your family will love to. Simply print it out and take it with you as you go trick or treating tonight. Your whole family will love it!
We are going to use it for our 3 year old, who will trick or treat, but likes to take her time, and will ask to get in the stroller after about an hour. It will be around that time that she is looking for something to do, and this Scavenger Hunt will be the perfect way to keep her occupied will her older siblings keep knocking doors.
I hope you and your family can use it tonight also.
Happy Haunting.
Tell me, who are you trick-or-treating with tonight?
Bed Wetting Help!
There is hope that this sponsored post for GoodNites*TRU-FIT* machine washable underwear, will make life easier for families dealing with bedwetting.
When my husband and I started our family, we tried to consider many of the challenges we might face. Despite our preparation, bedwetting was not a challenge we anticipated. Only one of our children has dealt with bed wetting, but we quickly learned that it was not just physically draining, but emotionally draining too!
According to a GoodNites® brand study, it is estimated that 1 in 6 children between the ages of 4 and 12 (in the US) suffer from bedwetting. Also know as nocturnal enuresis. We might think that bedwetting doesn't affect other areas of our children's lives, but the American Academy of Pediatrics shows that psychologically, children who wet the bed do not want to participate in fun activities, such as sleepovers, because of their fear and embarrassment. And, before you think your child is the "only one", know that bedwetting is a fairly common condition.
Kids wet the bed for many different reasons. The first, and most important thing to remember if we have a child who wets the bed, is that we have to be patient. We should never punish our children if they wet the bed, or shame them if it happens. Threatening and demeaning is also out of the question. They are not doing it on purpose.
For me, the best way to avoid the negative thoughts and frustrations, especially amongst the extra laundry every single day, was to put myself in our child's shoes. Yep, I would constantly ask myself how they must feel. Cold, wet, stressed, tired, embarrassed, nervous about parental response, nervous about their friends finding out... the list goes on. These thoughts and understandings made it so much easier to be patient.
We also did the following....
- Eliminated an excessive amount of liquid within two hours of bed.
- Woke our child up and took them to the bathroom right before WE went to bed.
- Analyzed any physiological stresses they might be dealing with. Like a recent move, a new school, an unsettled family life, divorce...anything that might be taking an emotional toll.
- Committed to spend more one-on-one time with our child, to strengthen our relationship and to make sure they weren't wetting the bed for attention.
- Took our child to the doctor to make sure there wasn't a medical condition.
- Gave ourselves permission to use protective bedding and protective underwear. Giving myself permission was a big deal. It eliminated shame and blame. It also gave our child the power to "clean" themselves up if they wet the bed.
They are real, machine washable underwear, you can purchase them at Target, and they wash and wear just like real underwear. They have a disposable liner that keeps pj's and sheets dry.
Don't forget to use the 2 dollar off coupon that is "on package."
Make Bedwetting easier and less stressful on everyone.
This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of GoodNites* TRU-FIT*.
Friday
Studio 5 Today! 1pm MST
Hey Utah Friends, be sure you tune in to Studio 5 on KSL today at 1pm MST. I will be chatting with Brooke about what to do when we disagree with our spouse on parenting decisions.
Great tips to make parenting easier for you and your spouse.
See you at 1.
p.s. If you miss it, I will post the video on FamilyVolley as soon as it is available.
Thanks for watching!
Thursday
Best Tips for Parenting Teenagers - Part 1
Teenagers! Agh, a stage that every parent worries about. It can be a huge challenge to navigate these critical years in our children's lives. Our son just turned 12 this summer, and although he isn't an official "teenager" yet, we can already see changes in the way he thinks and acts. Not bad, just different. He has more need to spread his wings, find himself, and is looking to establish his self esteem.
The teenage years are a time of huge change for our kids. They are trying to figure out who they are, what they like, and where they are going. Plus, they want to be accepted by not just us, but by their peers also. It is a time of soul searching and identity building.
The teenage years are a time of huge change for our kids. They are trying to figure out who they are, what they like, and where they are going. Plus, they want to be accepted by not just us, but by their peers also. It is a time of soul searching and identity building.
We talk a lot about infants and toddlers, but our toddlers are growing up and it is time to talk tips for our teenagers.
Today, let's start with our first 6 tips for parenting teenagers.
Today, let's start with our first 6 tips for parenting teenagers.
1. Don’t survive the Adolescent years, THRIVE the Adolescents
years.
Stop labeling and
get rid of the stereotypes. We shouldn’t expect the worst during these years. Not all teenagers become monsters. Most teenagers are
great. Give them a chance. We live in a universe of attraction and what we
focus on and put our energy on is what will become our reality. Focus on how
great it is that you have children who are learning who they are and developing
their identity.
2. Love them from the inside out.
We respond to
people, primarily by how THEY feel about us on the inside, not by their
behavior. As parents, we can make right
choices with our teenagers, but if on the inside, we are irritated, feel they
are irresponsible, disappointed in them and their decisions, then that is what
they will respond to. That is actually how they will behave. We will bring out
in them, the exact behavior we say we don’t like, when we see them as objects
that are making our lives miserable. Praise them,
compliment them stop nitpicking them.
If they know we love them,
above all other things, it allows us to discipline, communicate, be honest and
open, and they will accept it.
3. Communicate. It is the Golden Rule of raising
teenagers.
We have to keep the lines of
communication open. We have too!
There are two
times when teenagers want to talk.
- When we are driving in the car with them. (Don’t have to look at one another, know there is an end so they are more likely to talk.
- Before they go to bed. (They are tired and willing to let their guard down and chat)
Be available during these
times to LISTEN, and instead of telling them things,
ask questions so they can discover answers on their own.
ANOTHER GREAT
PLACE TO COMMUNICATE is over common activities. Find something that you and your teenager can do together AND DO IT.
It takes all the stress out and you will find that while you are sharing
something enjoyable, they will want to talk and open up. They feel you
understand them because you both share joy for the activity.
4. Understand teenage time zones.
We need to
recognize that our teenagers naturally, work in a different time zone than we do. This is not bad, or wrong, just different. We don’t
get mad at people in NY because they work in a different time zone! When we ask
them to do something, and they say “sure, “in a bit” or “yeah, give me a
while.” Instead of being irritated because they are
not doing it immediately, or on our time zone, let’s be glad they have said
YES. They said YES!!! If we respect that, they will not only actually do
what we have asked, but they might even do it sooner. If we know this is how
they work, we can ask sooner, explain better. Instead of insisting immediately.
5. Be a Consultant, not a Manager.
Up to this point in our
children’s lives, we have been the manager of
their lives. We manage all the aspects.
Then, our children hit the teenager years and they
fire us as their managers. So parents usually do one of two things.
- They either abandon their kids…"good luck with everything, hope you make it."
- They become extra controlling and try to force their kids to do what they want.
Neither are
the right way to go. (We are trying to relive our childhood, safeguard them
from what we know is out there, etc…)
Being a consultant
is more about influence and less about control. Consultants share their expertise and knowledge to help attain goals
and solve problems.
One
way we can do this is to…
ASK, don’t
tell.
When we
speak to our children we need to ask them for help,
ask them for their ideas and opinions, rather than telling them what we believe
they should think or do.
“What do you think about
that.” “How do you think we could handle that.” Etc…
This can be really hard because we have been there, we
know what the future holds if certain decisions are made, or not made, but it
is their time to learn for themselves. That is our job, to help them do that.
6. Don’t get lost in the consequences
When we are parenting
teenagers, it can be very easy for us to get caught up in the consequences when
our children make mistakes. Now, there does need to be consequences.
Absolutely, BUT…. A few things to consider.
Consequences
should fit the crime and they should have kids DO SOMETHING, opposed to taking
something away. Mow the lawn, opposed to
loosing their phone.
BUT it
is the follow up that we as parents usually forget. AFTER the consequence, sit down with your child and
ask them “was there any part of you that thought you
should call home when you were going to be late for curfew”? OR, did the
thought ever cross your mind that maybe you should have left earlier so you
were home on time”?
They will say yes! They will,
and when they do, ask them…”WHAT DO YOU THINK STOPPED
YOU FROM LISTENING TO YOURSELF?” “WHAT GOT IN THE WAY OF YOU LISTENTING AND
TRUSTING YOUR THOUGHTS”?
They will come up with some
sort of answer. When they do, go on to explain that “you
know what is right, Listen to yourself. You have all you need to make right and
good decisions. “
Then, move on, don’t’ lecture. And don’t get lost in the consequence. It
is over and done.
Do the teenage years worry you?
What worries you the most?
What tips can you add for parenting teenagers?
Don't miss Part 2 of our Parenting Teenagers Series. By the time we are done, you will have all you need to tackle the stage in your child life.
Do the teenage years worry you?
What worries you the most?
What tips can you add for parenting teenagers?
Don't miss Part 2 of our Parenting Teenagers Series. By the time we are done, you will have all you need to tackle the stage in your child life.
Monday
TEEN WEEK: Raising Teens- "Age of Opportunity"
It's TEEN WEEK here on Family Volley! All week we will be talking about those tough adolescent years, with tips and tricks to not only surviving, but THRIVING! You don't want to miss it!
Just when we think the "two's" are terrible, a parent will argue that it doesn't hold a candle to a 15 year old in the middle of puberty. And with adolescence lasting longer than ever before, it's time to give this stage of life more attention.
To kick off Teen Week I want to introduce you to the best book I have read on the subject. If you have a teen, know a teen, will have a teen one day, or work with teens, you need to read "Age of Opportunity" by Laurence Steinberg.
The book, filled with years of research and findings, clearly explains how the adolescent brain works, which is a necessary place to start if we want to know how to parent them during those years. Steinberg explains that most of our understanding about adolescents are incorrect and gives us the truth about this time in life. By the time you are done, you will have a wonderful understanding of teenagers, how they work, why they do the things they do, and what you need to do to help them become successful adults. Not to mention what we should do in the heat of raising them when we don't think we can survive one more day.
There are solid reasons to be concerned about our adolescents.
You will not only find solid research, but solutions.
As we head into Teen Week, here are a few understandings that you need to start with. Keep these as your foundation. The rest of the week will build on, and add to them. By the time we are done, you will have a game plan to use for your teenager.
First, adolescents is just as important as the early years in terms of the potential impact of experiences on the brain. A teenagers brain is plastic (Steinberg, 2014). It can be altered by experience. What happens during these crucial years will affect the rest of their lives.
Second, children are maturing earlier than ever before. As parents, we have to be prepared before they are.
Third, we want to be authoritative parents. Demonstrating a good mix of warmth, firmness, and support.
Forth, we can't love our children too much. There is no harm in telling them we love them EVERY day, in showing affection to them every day, in praising them every day.
Those four truths will be the foundation for all we do here during Teen Week. Get ready to take some notes so you can strengthen the relationship with your adolescent.
If you want to get your hands on the "Age of Opportunity" (and you do), you can find it on Amazon, IndieBound, and Barnes and Noble.
What is the hardest part about raising a teenager?
Just when we think the "two's" are terrible, a parent will argue that it doesn't hold a candle to a 15 year old in the middle of puberty. And with adolescence lasting longer than ever before, it's time to give this stage of life more attention.
To kick off Teen Week I want to introduce you to the best book I have read on the subject. If you have a teen, know a teen, will have a teen one day, or work with teens, you need to read "Age of Opportunity" by Laurence Steinberg.
The book, filled with years of research and findings, clearly explains how the adolescent brain works, which is a necessary place to start if we want to know how to parent them during those years. Steinberg explains that most of our understanding about adolescents are incorrect and gives us the truth about this time in life. By the time you are done, you will have a wonderful understanding of teenagers, how they work, why they do the things they do, and what you need to do to help them become successful adults. Not to mention what we should do in the heat of raising them when we don't think we can survive one more day.
There are solid reasons to be concerned about our adolescents.
- American adolescents continue to underperform teens from many industrialized countries that spend a lot less on schooling.
- The US once boasted one of the the world's highest college graduation rates. It now doesn't even make the top 10.
- One in 5 American high-school seniors abuses alcohol at least twice a month.
- Nearly one third of young women in the US will get pregnant at least once by age twenty. The US leads the industrialized world in teen pregnancies and STD's and ranks near the top in adolescent abortions.
- In 2011, nearly one-third of the women who gave birth had never been married.
- Twenty percent of all high-school-aged boys in American take prescription medication for ADHD
- Adolescent obesity is three times more common now than it was in the 1970's.
You will not only find solid research, but solutions.
As we head into Teen Week, here are a few understandings that you need to start with. Keep these as your foundation. The rest of the week will build on, and add to them. By the time we are done, you will have a game plan to use for your teenager.
First, adolescents is just as important as the early years in terms of the potential impact of experiences on the brain. A teenagers brain is plastic (Steinberg, 2014). It can be altered by experience. What happens during these crucial years will affect the rest of their lives.
Second, children are maturing earlier than ever before. As parents, we have to be prepared before they are.
Third, we want to be authoritative parents. Demonstrating a good mix of warmth, firmness, and support.
Forth, we can't love our children too much. There is no harm in telling them we love them EVERY day, in showing affection to them every day, in praising them every day.
Those four truths will be the foundation for all we do here during Teen Week. Get ready to take some notes so you can strengthen the relationship with your adolescent.
If you want to get your hands on the "Age of Opportunity" (and you do), you can find it on Amazon, IndieBound, and Barnes and Noble.
What is the hardest part about raising a teenager?
Wednesday
Improving Family Communication-Does Your Family Like the Way You Communicate? Take a Test.
When it comes to learning to communicate, family is the school room. The way we communicate with our children and our spouses, teaches our children how to communicate. If we sulk and pout, raise our voices, ignore and hold grudges, we are teaching our children that that is the way to do things. Which sets them up for trouble as they get older. They will take those same bad habits into their future relationships.
But...if we work to model healthy communication, listen more than we talk, rarely use sarcasm and insults, say what we mean, practice empathy, and ask questions when we have them, we send our children out with valuable tools to use in every area of their lives.
The funny thing is, how we see ourselves communicating, is not always the same way our family sees things. Time to take a step back, be honest with ourselves and with one another, and take a little communication inventory, to see how well things are going in our homes.
Take a few minutes to answer the following questions. Then, cover up your answers and have your family answer the same questions about you. (You can print the inventory right from this post.) Obviously you want to answer true to all of them, and you want your family to do the same. But chances are, that won't happen. Be open to the constructive criticism and evaluate what each person in the family can do better.
You will love what an activity like this can do for your family. Let me know how it goes!
But...if we work to model healthy communication, listen more than we talk, rarely use sarcasm and insults, say what we mean, practice empathy, and ask questions when we have them, we send our children out with valuable tools to use in every area of their lives.
The funny thing is, how we see ourselves communicating, is not always the same way our family sees things. Time to take a step back, be honest with ourselves and with one another, and take a little communication inventory, to see how well things are going in our homes.
Take a few minutes to answer the following questions. Then, cover up your answers and have your family answer the same questions about you. (You can print the inventory right from this post.) Obviously you want to answer true to all of them, and you want your family to do the same. But chances are, that won't happen. Be open to the constructive criticism and evaluate what each person in the family can do better.
You will love what an activity like this can do for your family. Let me know how it goes!
Tuesday
Back To School Time Capsule (With Printable)
Here from Studio 5, looking for the Printable? Just scroll down and you will run right into it!
Today is our children's first day of the new school year. We have had a great summer, although way to short, and the kids are ready for school to start. I am glad they are so excited.
This is a big year for the kids, but also for us as parents. Our son will be starting 7th grade. Yikes! Junior High School? Were those years really good for anyone? On top of that, he will be attending junior high at the local high school. Not part time, but full time, just like if he was in 10th grade. I am nervous for what he will be exposed to. High school is a very big place for a barely twelve year old. Fingers crossed we have done our part to prepare him.Our 9 year old daughter is starting 4th grade. She is in a French emersion program and spends half the day speaking English and the other half of the day speaking French. No English allowed. She has loved it up to this point and am guessing, that although I took a lot of French in high school, she has the potential to pass me up this year.
Our 6 year old is going to be in 1st grade. That means she is starting the French program also and will be in school all day. I don't know what I am going to do without her around during the day.
I am going to miss them. A lot.
With all the changes, and the fact that I feel like I can't keep up with how fast our kids are growing up, we decided a few years ago to start documenting all the fun changes that take place each school year. The Back to School Time Capsules will help you keep track of your children's growth, without taking a lot of time or resources. And your kids will love it. Don't worry if school has already started. There is plenty of time and your kids will still be very willing.
Today is our children's first day of the new school year. We have had a great summer, although way to short, and the kids are ready for school to start. I am glad they are so excited.
This is a big year for the kids, but also for us as parents. Our son will be starting 7th grade. Yikes! Junior High School? Were those years really good for anyone? On top of that, he will be attending junior high at the local high school. Not part time, but full time, just like if he was in 10th grade. I am nervous for what he will be exposed to. High school is a very big place for a barely twelve year old. Fingers crossed we have done our part to prepare him.Our 9 year old daughter is starting 4th grade. She is in a French emersion program and spends half the day speaking English and the other half of the day speaking French. No English allowed. She has loved it up to this point and am guessing, that although I took a lot of French in high school, she has the potential to pass me up this year.
Our 6 year old is going to be in 1st grade. That means she is starting the French program also and will be in school all day. I don't know what I am going to do without her around during the day.
I am going to miss them. A lot.
With all the changes, and the fact that I feel like I can't keep up with how fast our kids are growing up, we decided a few years ago to start documenting all the fun changes that take place each school year. The Back to School Time Capsules will help you keep track of your children's growth, without taking a lot of time or resources. And your kids will love it. Don't worry if school has already started. There is plenty of time and your kids will still be very willing.
The idea is to document the small things about your child that will change over the next school year. Things like height, weight, likes and dislikes, even handwriting.
You don't need much.
A container
Rope or string or ribbon
Paper
Pens/Pencils
Camera
First...decide what you want each child to keep their capsule in. Mason jar, #10 Can, She Box, anything will work.
HEIGHT
Have your child stand up against a wall and lightly mark how tall they are. THEN...take your rope/string/ribbon and stretch it the length of your measurement. Cut the string to the right height length, and put it in your time capsule. They will love getting it out at the end of the school year and seeing how tall they have grown.
WEIGHT
Write down how much your child weights. If you don't know, don't worry, skip this one.
LIKES/DISLIKES
On a piece of paper, have your child write down the following...
favorite color
favorite meal
favorite fruit
favorite vegetable
favorite activity
least favorite food
favorite TV show
favorite movie
favorite book
favorite subject in school
favorite friend
favorite snack
favorite shirt/pants/shoes
favorite toy
You get the point. Add your own to the list.
Here is a Printable you can use for your own Back To School Time Capsules. Simply click on the picture, download, and print out one copy for each of your kids.
GOALS
Have your child write down 3 goals they have for this school year. At the end of the year you can see if they accomplished those goals.
HANDWRITING
Have your child write their name. For even more fun. Have them write it on a piece of paper/chalkboard/whiteboard and then take of picture of them holding the piece of paper up. This way you will have a picture of them and see what their writing was like. It will be fun to see how their writing has changed at the end of the school year.
TRACE HANDS/FEET
Trace your children's hands. Include the tracing in the capsule. Your kids will love to see how their hands have grown. We like to include feet also.
PICTURE
If you took a picture of your child holding up their name, then you can use that as your picture. If not, you probably took a picture the first day of school. Add a picture to the time capsule and you are set. If you are not really great at getting pictures from your camera/phone to the print shop, you can always wait until the school pictures come home and add one of those to the time capsule.
Once you have everything filled out and gathered, put it in your container of choice and seal it up. Bury them in the backyard, put them on a high shelf, under the bed, anywhere. Just tuck them away until the end of school, or the beginning of the next school year.
It will be so fun to have a special BACK TO SCHOOL PARTY next year when we open them up and see how the kids have grown and changed. And then start the tradition all over again for the new school year.
THE ULTIMATE GOAL
We have decided that we are going to do this every year until they graduate from high school. Each new school year, as we go through last years contents to see the kids growth and development, I take the contents of the capsules and put them in a regular old legal size envelope. I hole punch the envelopes and put them into a three ring binder for storage. Each child has their own binder, and that is all we have to store until they leave for college or get married and want to take their time capsules with them. What a great way to quickly and simply document all the growth and development that is happening.
Simple, fun, and memorable. It doesn't get better than that.
How do you keep your memories?
How do you ring in the new school year?
Anyone have kids in an emersion program? What language are they learning?
Monday
3-Night Hotel GIVEAWAY in California!!!
What a fun week! I hope you had an opportunity to get to know the creative, awesome, talented and beautiful contributors in the Contributor Q&A Blog Hop! I know I did. I love getting to know people and learning more about what they love to do, what they love to eat, and how they like to fill their time. If you hopped around, I hope you were able to make new friends, find new ideas, and gather new recipes. Everyone loves new recipes!
How many times, in your stressful life, have you dreamed about laying out on the beach with a great book? 'Or so she says...' to the rescue! So, to further expand on our favorites, all of the OSSS contributors got together to give away their favorite books, perfect for summer reading! The coolest part is, one person will win EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. That's right, the whole bundle! That's 15 books, yo. Oh, but it gets better. Get Away Today, the greatest travel agency ever and 'Or so she says...' contributor, offered another winner a 3-night hotel stay in Anaheim or San Diego (winner’s choice) with their choice of two adult theme park tickets... PLUS, they get the 15 book bundle too!
Ready to enter? So, all we ask is for you to follow 'Or so she says...' and the contributors on Pinterest. We are all pin-maniacs and know you'll love the great ideas we send your way. After you enter, be sure to scroll down and check out all the books included in the giveaway. It's so fun to see what each contributor picked as her favorite book!
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Want to know which books are included in the bundle?? What are the contributors' favorites?? Check 'em out!
.
1. Winter Sea by Susanna Kearsley ~ "This book was not what I expected...it surpassed what I was hoping for. Mystery, romance and intrigue. Great characters and an interesting plot. It was a great read and perfect for summer reading!" Jana of Double the Deliciousness
2. Plate to Pixel by Helene Dujardin - "This book is a favorite because it teaches how to not only how photograph food, but how to do it beautifully!" Gina of Kleinworth and Co.
3. These is My Words by Nancy Turner "While I'm a country/ farm girl at heart, I can't even begin to imagine what the early settlers went through! I love how they worked the land, built their own homes, and made everything from scratch! And I'm always up for a good love story! Jack and Sarah's won't disappoint!" Brooke of Blissful Roots
4. The Greatest Salesman in the World by Og Mandino - "Aw, I love this book! It's a super unique book, in that it's a parable, teaching you how to be a better person, but also an activity book. Each chapter, you read over and over, until you master the character trait. It's a great story with lots of great thoughts. I think I highlighted half the book!" Mariel of 'Or so she says...'
5. Eat Cake by Jeanne Ray "Eat Cake will make it's way into your list of favorite books, it's a quick and enjoyable read. I love this book for more reasons than the fact that the main character shares my name! It'll have you laughing and crying- all at the same time! If you're like me and have a unexplainable urge to bake... you'll totally connect with Eat Cake!" Ruthie of Cooking with Ruthie
6. Wonder by RJ Palacio - "My 9-year-old daughter recommended Wonder to me and I enjoyed it just as much as she did. This is a compelling novel that is fun and easy enough for summer, but also intelligent and thought-provoking. Share it with your family when you are finished!" Allison of Tips for Family Trips
7. The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin - "I love this book because it is getting me to think deeper about what I do to bring happiness upon myself. I am a happy person, but am loving the new outlook and am loving making new goals to make myself really live a happy life." Kiki of Kiki and Company
8. Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar - "It's easy to think that once a certain thing happens, I'll be happy. Well, this book provides little life secrets to be happier each and every day. It is applicable for every life stage. It has changed my way of thinking about happiness." Melissa of So Festive!
9. Blackmoore by Julianne Donaldson - "Sometimes a mom just needs a good, quick, easy summer read to distract her from doing more laundry or to keep her busy during swim lessons. If you love a good Jane Austen romance, you will love this book! Set in Jane Austen's English countryside of 1820, this romance will keep you quickly turning the pages as you watch Kate's struggle to learn to follow her heart!" Veronica of Lolly Lu Designs
10. Leadership and Self- Deception - "Do you want to know the secret to having a happy and successful family and marriage? Want to know how to have successful relationships with anyone you come in contact with? Leadership and Self-deception holds the key to mending, strengthening and flourishing in all of your relationships. This book is a life changer- Promise!" Heather of Family Volley
11. Surprise Inside Cakes by Amanda Rettke - "It's a beautiful book of cakes and it's full of cake decorating tips for the everyday bake. Amazing cakes for every special occasion, all with a little surprise on the inside." Zainab of Blahnik Baker
12. The Child Whisperer by Carol Tuttle - "It taught me how to parent my very determined toddler (at the time) based on her personality type." Amy of The Connection We Share
13. A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaleo Hosseini - "I read this as part of a book club and it has stuck with me ever since. It is a beautifully written, emotionally gripping story of two Afghan women's suffering, strength, and resilience. What I love most about it is the way it celebrates the strength of the human spirit - a beautiful thing!" Cathy of Lemon Tree Dwelling
14. I've Got Your Number by Sophie Kinsella - "A light, charming book by the author of the popular Shopaholic series. This clever romantic comedy makes for a fun and easy summer read, by the pool or on the beach!" Samantha of Five Heart Home
15. Princess Academy by Shannon Hale - "I loved this simple story that has some fun little twists. My favorite part is that my daughter loved this book as much as I did. I love being able to enjoy the same books as my daughter. This is one that was enjoyable for us both!" Holly of Bits of Everything
Longest post of your life? Maybe! But, it's worth it. Good luck to you!
Lets go over those prizes again:
Grand Prize Winner: 15 'Contributors' Favorite Books' Bundle PLUS a 3-night hotel stay in Anaheim or San Diego (winner’s choice) with their choice of two adult theme park tickets! Vacation courtesy of Get Away Today. Runner Up: 15 'Contributors' Favorite Books' Bundle (details of books below.)Ready to enter? So, all we ask is for you to follow 'Or so she says...' and the contributors on Pinterest. We are all pin-maniacs and know you'll love the great ideas we send your way. After you enter, be sure to scroll down and check out all the books included in the giveaway. It's so fun to see what each contributor picked as her favorite book!
1. Winter Sea by Susanna Kearsley ~ "This book was not what I expected...it surpassed what I was hoping for. Mystery, romance and intrigue. Great characters and an interesting plot. It was a great read and perfect for summer reading!" Jana of Double the Deliciousness
2. Plate to Pixel by Helene Dujardin - "This book is a favorite because it teaches how to not only how photograph food, but how to do it beautifully!" Gina of Kleinworth and Co.
3. These is My Words by Nancy Turner "While I'm a country/ farm girl at heart, I can't even begin to imagine what the early settlers went through! I love how they worked the land, built their own homes, and made everything from scratch! And I'm always up for a good love story! Jack and Sarah's won't disappoint!" Brooke of Blissful Roots
4. The Greatest Salesman in the World by Og Mandino - "Aw, I love this book! It's a super unique book, in that it's a parable, teaching you how to be a better person, but also an activity book. Each chapter, you read over and over, until you master the character trait. It's a great story with lots of great thoughts. I think I highlighted half the book!" Mariel of 'Or so she says...'
5. Eat Cake by Jeanne Ray "Eat Cake will make it's way into your list of favorite books, it's a quick and enjoyable read. I love this book for more reasons than the fact that the main character shares my name! It'll have you laughing and crying- all at the same time! If you're like me and have a unexplainable urge to bake... you'll totally connect with Eat Cake!" Ruthie of Cooking with Ruthie
6. Wonder by RJ Palacio - "My 9-year-old daughter recommended Wonder to me and I enjoyed it just as much as she did. This is a compelling novel that is fun and easy enough for summer, but also intelligent and thought-provoking. Share it with your family when you are finished!" Allison of Tips for Family Trips
7. The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin - "I love this book because it is getting me to think deeper about what I do to bring happiness upon myself. I am a happy person, but am loving the new outlook and am loving making new goals to make myself really live a happy life." Kiki of Kiki and Company
8. Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar - "It's easy to think that once a certain thing happens, I'll be happy. Well, this book provides little life secrets to be happier each and every day. It is applicable for every life stage. It has changed my way of thinking about happiness." Melissa of So Festive!
9. Blackmoore by Julianne Donaldson - "Sometimes a mom just needs a good, quick, easy summer read to distract her from doing more laundry or to keep her busy during swim lessons. If you love a good Jane Austen romance, you will love this book! Set in Jane Austen's English countryside of 1820, this romance will keep you quickly turning the pages as you watch Kate's struggle to learn to follow her heart!" Veronica of Lolly Lu Designs
10. Leadership and Self- Deception - "Do you want to know the secret to having a happy and successful family and marriage? Want to know how to have successful relationships with anyone you come in contact with? Leadership and Self-deception holds the key to mending, strengthening and flourishing in all of your relationships. This book is a life changer- Promise!" Heather of Family Volley
11. Surprise Inside Cakes by Amanda Rettke - "It's a beautiful book of cakes and it's full of cake decorating tips for the everyday bake. Amazing cakes for every special occasion, all with a little surprise on the inside." Zainab of Blahnik Baker
12. The Child Whisperer by Carol Tuttle - "It taught me how to parent my very determined toddler (at the time) based on her personality type." Amy of The Connection We Share
13. A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaleo Hosseini - "I read this as part of a book club and it has stuck with me ever since. It is a beautifully written, emotionally gripping story of two Afghan women's suffering, strength, and resilience. What I love most about it is the way it celebrates the strength of the human spirit - a beautiful thing!" Cathy of Lemon Tree Dwelling
14. I've Got Your Number by Sophie Kinsella - "A light, charming book by the author of the popular Shopaholic series. This clever romantic comedy makes for a fun and easy summer read, by the pool or on the beach!" Samantha of Five Heart Home
15. Princess Academy by Shannon Hale - "I loved this simple story that has some fun little twists. My favorite part is that my daughter loved this book as much as I did. I love being able to enjoy the same books as my daughter. This is one that was enjoyable for us both!" Holly of Bits of Everything
Longest post of your life? Maybe! But, it's worth it. Good luck to you!
Fine print: Must be U.S. resident and 18 years or older to enter. Vacation package must be booked at least 60 days in advance and is subject to availability and some blackout dates. This post contains affiliate links.
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